I am so....!!!

This is my first post in this blog.. Just to write down my thought, feeling..

Today having a presentation(teaching method in Economics) early in the morning... I really hate presentation early in the morning... coz i'm too sleepy... But this doesnt matter much, coz i can go back to sleep after the presentation.

But after the presentation just now... Cant go back to sleep, coz I'm in a super down mood.. I never had such feeling, feel so worthless after doing the presentation...

I never thought i will be that blur until i forgot to bring my pendrive which consists my presentation file, on the presentation that day itself. When i realize that already 8.55am, 5 min more we are going to start presentation.. Other than anxious and worry, i cant think of others feeling that i had for that moments...

Thanks for my housemate helping me to take it and i rush to fetch her... It's already 10 minits later when i reach the smartboard lab, and lecturer already there.

How can i present with such anxious, worries?? I'm so guilty coz my partner also panic because of that... Extremely sad..

When the time i present, i just couldnt present well... feel like losing all the malay vocabulary, what come to mind is only english vocab... During presentation, I realise i dont know my students'(others friends attending the same tutorial) name, how am i going to ask them question without knowing who they are...

After the presentation, the lecturer criticise our teaching... I feel so unworthy after the whole presentation..

In this moment, I really know God surely opposes the proud... I thought I can always be steady enough for my presentation, since i can speak well.. But, at that moment, when i can't even think of any vocab, make me realise I'm just NOTHING without God. If God doesnt with you, there is nothing you can do.

It was all my fault, too proud.. too blur... Forgive me, Father.

Exteremely sad at the corner,
zoe